Time Travlin' Terry
by Jace22
Summary: If you like utter and complete random insanity, then this is the parody for you. warnings: marysues, long lost sistersue, time travlin, idiocy, magic, slash, girlyness, bad jokes made by Twobit and everyone else, Dally's NY stories, nonsense, and more
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: None of this ever happened. I wish it did because that would mean you could go into book worlds. But it can't happen. I don't own characters from the outsiders… I own the name "terry riding" but not the person lol.

IMPORTANT: Anyway, first kicked me off because it had a real person. He's not really main just a way to lead into it all. Therefore I changed it to Terry Riding. Hint he plays Steve in the movie.

Time Travlin' Terry

Terry Riding sat on his bed trying to get into character. He would have been listening to Britney Spears music if she had been around then. Sadly, she wasn't, so he had to be content with the silence. He was trying to figure out his character, but it was extremely hard considering he had to go based solely off of Ponyboy's description of Steve. He really wanted to do as well as he possibly could in the little screen time he had. This was a great break for him, and he could get some good publicity.

He was pretty far in the book, but he was starting to get sleepy and miss parts of the story. He started missing so much that he would get confused and have to re-read things multiple times. He really wanted to keep going, but his body had other plans for him. Dun Dun DUUNNN! So Terry Riding fell asleep. Suddenly, unbeknownst to him…. :magical, mysterious music plays: a woman in a consuming pink dress floated in.

"I will help you Terry Riding. Bipity bobity booooooOOOOO." The room began to spin and spin, and suddenly Terry Riding was teleported somewhere……

Terry Riding was snoring loudly while lying in the middle of a field-like area with a lot of tall, overgrown grass.

"God, what the hell is that god-awful sound? God!" Dally yelled suddenly to Ponyboy and Johnny as they approached the aforementioned field.

"Um…maybe it's a…a….a… SOC! AHHHHAAAHHHH" Johnny said and then proceeded to give a strange scream and do a strange jump. He looked somewhat like a frightened school girl.

"Or maybe it's not AHHHAAAHHH." Dally said mimicking the weird scream/jump.

Johnny giggled insanely, denying the fact Dally was teasing him. "Wow Dally you just looked sooo funny! DO IT AGAIN!"

Dally ignored him and turned to Ponyboy as he said, "Why don't we just go find out?" Ponyboy wondered why the other two hadn't thought of that.

"But there could be a…. a…. a… SOC! AHHHAAAAHHH!" He did the weird jump/scream again. This time looking like a screaming fish flopping in mid-air.

"God Johnny, would you quit it? A sock isn't going to be lying in the middle of a field snoring." Dally rolled his eyes.  
Hehe…hehe…you said sock…haha a sock lying in a field snoring." He then proceeded to laugh insanely.

"Let's just go check it out," Dally turned to Johnny "and don't you dare say it again."

"Can I say it a different way?"

"No."

"Can I say it in a box while eating lox with a fox?"

"No, but you can try saying it in a dumpster with…a mobster."

"Yeah, um, a word of advice Dally, don't try to rhyme again. Ever." Ponyboy said, recovering from his laughter over the mispronunciation.

"I could really rhyme if I wanted to." Dally mumbled as they walked towards the field where Terry Riding was still snoring.

"You know, it's a miracle no one else came to investigate this." Ponyboy mused.

"We maybe the fact that it's 5 A.M has to do with it." Johnny said trying to be funny.

Ponyboy didn't get it. "Johnny it's 3:00 in the afternoon…." Ponyboy said slowly.

"People have early bedtimes." Johnny said defensively and just for arguments sake added, "Besides 5:00 A.M and 3:00 P.M are both very busy times."

"Hey guys, it's just a guy snoring really loud. He's too hot and well dressed to be a bum though." Dally called to the other two as he looked down at the sleeping Tom.

Johnny and Ponyboy just stared at him strangely. They were thinking that maybe they had heard wrong, and they didn't want to get Dally angry with them.

"OOOOOO!" squealed Ponyboy. "Let's poke him with a stick!"

"Um…why?" Dally asked.

"Well, I've always wanted to poke a dead guy with a stick but this is the next best thing."

"Um…right…well, we should wake him up anyway so no one—girls or guys—will rape or attack his hot bod'." Dally said knowingly.

Johnny just looked terrified, while Ponyboy ran to get a stick. While Dally and Johnny waited for Ponyboy, Dally tried to make conversation with Johnny.

"So… your name's Johnny….that's gotta be cool…."

"Oh yeah, I get a lot o' perks with a name like Johnny... Why just the other day someone called me, and I turned around to answer to it. Really comes in handy at times because if I hadn't turned around I wouldn't have known I had gone to the janitor's closet instead of the bathroom at school…." He trailed off, realizing he had vowed never to tell anyone about that.

Dally nodded politely, and they stood there for a moment, awkwardly fidgeting in their places. "So….wanna go make out?" Dally asked.

"I GOT THE STICK!" Ponyboy screamed.

"GOD THANK GOD! IT TOOK YOU FUCKING LONG ENOUGH!" Johnny shrieked.

"Well is it my fault that sticks don't grow on trees?"

"Being with you two makes me miss the brilliance of a rock." Dally said flatly.

"Yeah, well, being with you makes me miss the straightness of Liberachi." Johnny blurted out.

"Ummm did I miss something?" Ponyboy asked. "Wait, never mind, I don't want to know. Let's just wake the guy up." He then proceeded to poke him with the stick.

"EWWWW! Is he getting a hard on?" Johnny asked.

"No…. there's some weird thing in his pocket." Ponyboy answered.

"Thing?"

"EWWW JOHNNY!" Ponyboy said and pulled out the strange object.

"Oh hand it over. I've seen one of those before." Dally lied. "It's one of those new toasters."

"It looks like a miniature phone to me. I'm just going out on a limb though." Ponyboy said.

"Who touched my cell phone!" Terry Riding demanded after feeling the lack of cell phone in his pocket.

"Hark, he speaks!" Dally said.

"Geez, Dally's acting fucking weird lately." Ponyboy hissed at Johnny, not realizing the fact that they weren't exactly normal.

"We better not ask him about it yet thought. Maybe it will go away like Susie did."

"Who's Susie?"

"Um…no one."

"Okaaay…"  
"SHEESH Pony! Don't badger me about it! Gosh, you're annoying!"

"Where the hell am I?" Terry Riding demanded, bringing Ponyboy and Johnny back into what was going on.

"WEEEELLLL I think we're in Tulsa, but Johnny argues that we never exactly said where we are…wait what?" Ponyboy confused himself.

"Ok that didn't help. Let me rephrase the question. Who the hell are you people?"

"I'm Johnny."

"I'm Dally."  
"I'm Aretha Johnson."

"POOOONNYYYBOOY!" The other two exclaimed in cheerful, "scolding" voices. "Don't be such a silly willie!"

"Well I just hope you don't break into spontaneous song." Terry Riding said.

"Would you like us to?" Johnny asked.

"I just said I hope you don't."

"Oh…" Johnny said, then finished defensively, "Well, we weren't going to break into song because if we _were_, Ponyboy would have introduced himself before Dally, not the other way around. Dally would have made the silly name and me and Ponyboy would have led into the song! That's how we rehearsed it!"

"You three rehearsed a musical number?" Terry asked, stifling a laugh.

"Well it's not like we had anything better to do! What's so funny about that?"

"Nothing…nothing…" He desperately thought of a way to change the touchy subject of musical numbers when he realized something. "I know who you are!"

"If you say big bird I swear I'll beat the shit outta you!" Dally threatened.

Terry found it amusing that this comment came from someone who rehearsed musical numbers in his spare time.

"Has someone ever said that to you Dally?" Johnny asked.

"Well, only when I'm in my chicken suit." He answered matter-of-factly.

"Yeah that makes sense."

"That's reasonable."

Johnny and Ponyboy said and nodded at each other.

"You guys are the Outsiders! I must have been transported into the book!" Somehow he just knew it. He didn't know how. It just seemed logical.

"Wow, I can't believe it took you so long. I mean, we told you our names like an hour ago!"

"Dude, it was like 3 minutes, and I was distracted by your musical number." He choked back laughter.

"I told you! We didn't perform it because they messed it up!" Johnny cried, feeling very angry about not getting to show off their well timed and practiced number.

"How do you know about us anyway?" Dally asked, finally realizing the obvious question at hand.

"Well you'll never believe me, but I'll tell you anyway because somehow you'll believe it anyway, and I have no where else to go, and I'm a pregnant mother on her own."

That last remark raised a few eyebrows. Four to be exact, including Terry Ridings eyebrow. "Um I was getting a bit into it…I'm an actor you know."

"Oh," Johnny said wisely, "That's what all the pregnant mothers say."

"I was just into it! I'm a man!"

"Ok."

"Anyway…" Terry Riding related back the whole four-minute story about how he fell asleep reading the book because he was studying for his part in the movie. He finished with how he was suddenly woken by his cell phone being removed only to see the three of them.

"Wow, I don't know why, but that all makes so much sense. I'm not even going to question or think about the fact that I'm supposedly a fictional character in your universe…or how we're supposedly in the same universe, yet we're in a book world and you're from the future…See I'm not going to think about it because it just confuses and disturbs me EHEHEHEHEHE." Ponyboy said hurriedly and started to laugh strangely. "Anyway," he recovered "You have to come home and live with us….FOREVER. I don't know why, but we need you!"

"Um…right…"

"So who's playing me in the movie?" Dally asked eagerly.

"Matt Dillon."

"He is hot?"

"Fucking hot."

"Do you have a picture?"

"Duh." Terry Riding took a picture of Matt Dillon out of his wallet.  
"Woah! I AM fucking hot! I like this movie."

"You haven't seen who plays Soda."

"AWW MAN WHO!"

"Rob Lowe!"

"Picture much?"  
"Omg yes!" He pulled out a picture of Rob Lowe.

"Omg omg omg! I want to see me screw Soda…wait ahh!"

"I think we need to end the chapter here." Ponyboy said after staring into space during Terry and Dally's whole conversation.

"What?"

"Well you said we're a book, so this is the end of the chapter."

"Who gives you the right to decide?" Johnny said angrily.

"Weeelll," Ponyboy said braggingly, "Terry Riding says that I'm the main character in the book so hahahahahaha."

Terry Riding didn't even bother to give all the spoilers of the book and didn't even notice how much this contradicted the whole story. It made him think S.E Hinton made the whole thing up.

TBC

Wow, I went back and fixed A LOT. I really love this story. It gets even more random and insane than this. Hopefully you'll like it. It's crazy.


	2. Chapter 2

Time Travlin' Terry: Chapter Two

Disclaimer- I don't own 'em…the only thing I own are the crappy parody characters I'll make up !

"This is the next chapter." Ponyboy decided as the four guys began walking over to the Curtis house, which was where everyone usually was.

Johnny looked irritated and jealous, but kept his mouth shut.

"Uh oh…" Ponyboy started.

"Spagettio!" Dally finished.

"No…." Ponyboy said and gave Dally a weird look. "Darry is going to kill me!"

"Why?" Johnny asked.

Ponyboy looked exasperated, "Haven't you realized that the two of us don't get along and he hates me and my life has become one big tragic…void!"

"…Usually he has a reason to get mad…"

"Well he's going to yell at me for not wearing a jacket then!" Ponyboy argued.

"It's 70 degrees!"

"He's very strict."

Johnny decided just to drop it.

"So…Terry… You like pictures?" Dally asked, trying to sound casual.

"If you want to see more pictures you can just ask." Terry said flatly.

They both waited. "Aren't you going to take them out?" Dally finally asked.

"You didn't ask."

"Can you take the pictures out?"

"Alright, but you should have just asked." He took a picture of Matt Dillon out.

"Has anyone ever kissed this?"

"No, why?"

"Ok great!" Dally started kissing the picture.

Terry politely averted his eyes. Dally kept kissing the picture until they reached the Curtis house.

"The porch light's still on…maybe they're asleep!" Ponyboy whispered.

"It's 3:45 P.M!" Dally said.

"I TOLD YOU! PEOPLE HAVE EARLY BEDTIMES!" Johnny shrieked.

"Isn't Darry at work?"

"It's…Saturday." Ponyboy said and then added, "DUN DUN DUN!"

Ponyboy peeked in the window and saw Darry sitting quietly in the armchair. He looked terrifyingly Darry-like. Ponyboy braced himself as they walked it.

"Why Ponyboy Curtis, it's two A.M; where the hell have you been?"

"OH NO! I've messed up the book world, and now things are starting to happen but all wrong!" Terry cried, not really caring.

"No…our clock just froze…" Ponyboy rolled his eyes.

"Ponyboy Curtis you got some s'planin to do! There's a girl named Patsy in there, and she claims you got her pregnant!"

"Um…that's impossible." He didn't want to say he was a virgin because that would be worse.

"Not according to her!"

"I'm telling you, unless I have magical sperm that can gravitate into a woman without me knowing, then it couldn't have been me. I didn't sleep with her."

Darry looked angrier. "Well why not?"

"…What?"

"Be a man Ponyboy! She's one hot Mama!"

"She's actually really ugly."

He poked his head in the kitchen and then looked to Ponyboy again, "You're right. However!" He yelled as Ponyboy began to look relaxed "You didn't have a jacket on!"

"SEE!" Ponyboy snarled at Dally and Johnny.

Darry seemed to be distracted for a moment, "Good god!" He said to the boys, while staring at Terry who had been wandering aimlessly around the small room. "Who is that creature of beauty?"

"Oh that's Terry Riding…" Dally re-explained his story.

"He must live with us. FOREVER." Darry and Ponyboy said.

"Who me?" Terry asked and pointed to himself.

"No the fairy behind you." Ponyboy said sarcastically.

He wasn't as clever as he thought though because there was in fact a fairy behind Terry Riding.

"HOLY CRAP PONY! How'd you do that? You must be magical!"

"That's just Two-bit in a tutu you morons! Wait a minute…let's pray it's a fairy."

"Nope it's me!" Two-bit said happily.

"Either you're really losing your touch at being funny and need to resort to this, or you're really stoned…or drunk." Dally said flatly.

"Probably." Two-bit agreed, causing the gang to slam their hands against their heads in perfect unison, including Soda and Steve who had been standing in a closet the whole time thinking it was a surprise party.

"Woah My GOD!" Soda screamed.

"What?" Steve asked.

"Our names both start with the letter S!"

Steve thought for a moment. "Soda…Steve…HEY THEY DO! We're S&S…it's a shame our names aren't Moda and Mteve!"

"Haha yeah because then we'd be M&M, like the candy!"

"Omg… SURPRISE!" Soda said, remembering about the surprise party.

"AHHHHHH SOCIAALLLLSS!" Johnny screamed and jumped out the window.

"Are things always this messed up?" Terry asked.

"Only at the Curtis house." Dally answered.

"Does that mean everywhere else is normal?"

"Compared to this?" Dally asked.

"Yeah." Terry answered.

"No."

"My fears have been realized." Terry shuddered.

"Speak English."

"I just did."

"Isn't realized a French word?"

"No. It's English."

"Shit. I owe Steve $40." Dally looked incredibly miffed.

"Well I play Steve in the movie, so you can just give it to me instead…"

"YOU'RE RIGHT!" Dally said happily and handed him the money.

Dally and Terry had a knack for ignoring everything around them. They didn't notice Two-bit performing ballet that he'd learned from his little sisters "ballet game." They didn't notice Soda and Steve providing music for Two-bit's dance. They were singing a song about the letter S and their names. Ponyboy and Darry just argued about Ponyboy's grades which really didn't matter since it was break. Johnny could be heard screaming about Soc's from outside. No one noticed Patsy leaving with the baby she had just given birth to.

"Oh Soda, this is Terry. We've decided to adopt him since he and Pony are such amazing friends."

"I only spoke to him for like five minutes worth of time." Terry said, confused. The only person he had really talked to was Dally, so he figured he was his friend in this insane place.

"I feel the same way Terry!" Dally said happily. "You're the only person I've really ever connected with!" Dally had hearts in his eyes.

"I didn't say anything." Terry said, looking scared.

"Oh! It's just that we're such good friends that I can read your mind."

"Yeah…that must be it."

"Well you need someplace to go and seeing as we can barely make ends meet for ourselves, we need another person around." Darry said.

"You mean to get a job?"

"No, I mean to live here."

"Um…right…" This was a very awkward situation, so he was glad when Ponyboy suggested they go get Johnny and take him to get ice-cream, so he would calm down.

On the way to the store a Soc boy came out of nowhere. "Know what? I don't want to be your friend!"

"I don't care?"

"HAHA You is not worthy!" He left with a smug smile on his Social face. He was a Soc, he didn't have to use "proper grammar."

Terry, Dally, Johnny and Ponyboy continued walking.

"I feel sad." Ponyboy said, frowning.  
"Why?" Johnny asked.

"I suddenly want to be his friend."

"Oh," Dally began wisely.

"Here comes another one of Dally's New York brag stories…" Johnny said.

"…that reminds me of the time I was in New York and I was robbing a store…then my friend came over and said hello and left. Then I got put in jail for being tuff."

"That had nothing to do with it." Ponyboy said angrily.

"Oh…right… I just felt like telling that story."

"It wasn't even good!"

"I'm TOUGH it doesn't have to be good." Dally said.

"Right then…" Terry muttered, "Let's just go get the ice-cream."

"He's right." Said Soda who had been following them.

"Soda, I didn't notice you there!" Ponyboy said and wagged a finger at him.

"I was right next to you the whole time!"

Ponyboy looked exasperated. "Well you know I never look on my left side!"

"I was on your right side."

"You know I never look on my right side." He corrected himself.

"Okilie doodley!" Soda grinned stupidly, trying out a new catch phrase.

"Hey!" Johnny said looking around, "Where's Steve? You two go almost everywhere together! You'd think he'd be stalking us right along with you! Is he hiding in a tree, or your pants?"

"Or is he hiding in your hair!" Dally said eagerly, trying to get in on the guessing. "I'll bet five bucks it's the hair! Come on Soda! Where is he?"

"I don't know! Why would you just assume that? I'm not his babysitter. We do NOT go everywhere together!"

"Yeah you do…the bathroom, dates, work, school—well before at least—walks, movies, dinner, our house…When have you ever been apart from him."  
Soda looked annoyed. "News flash we're two completely, separate people! Why does everyone always think we go together! I'm Soda he's Steve. I'm a thinking, breathing, hot, independent, individual, and he's Steve!"

"So you're insulting Steve then?"

"NO, IM SAYING WE'RE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE! Not two heads on one body!" (1)

"Sheesh, we were just wondering."

"Yeah, we were just saying you two are usually together."

"Yeah I guess so, but Steve and I aren't speaking!"

"Ok…but where is he?"

"You don't want to know…" Soda said darkly.

Or do we? Find out in the next compelling chapter of: TIME TRAVLIN' TERRY!

1- that was in an episode of that new rugrats all grown up series. I've been dying to write that someone ever since I've been in a room while my brother watched it.

R/R!


	3. Chapter 3

Time Travlin' Terry: Chapter Three

Thanks so much for all your reviews you guys! They made me so happy. I'm glad to hear you like the story. It gets even crazier don't you worry.

ONTO THE FIC XD!

"Ok fine." Dally shrugged and continued walking.

"Damn you're persistent! I'll give you that much." Soda said 'defeated', "Steve and I…Oh dear god, it's too unbearable to speak about!"

"Then don't." Dally said, and silently the others agreed. They really wanted their ice cream.

"FINE, _DALLY_! Just push and push me until I break! Have it your way then! Ok it all started when…"

:Suddenly things become wavy, signifying a flashback sequence that only Soda can see…and yet it would only make sense if you could see it….:

"Fuck, I must be really stoned today…" A nearby tree said.

"You must be new around here." Johnny said to the tree, seemingly out of nowhere. "Things are always like this."

"Ok…" Soda began, "We went to go play "interview with a toilet" in the bathroom at MY house!" Apparently the fact it was at the Curtis house was supposed to mean something. "And Steve was trying to hog the toilet and use all his ideas!"

"Is that all?" Ponyboy asked. It seemed like a pretty stupid reason to him.

"What the hell is "interview with a toilet"?" Terry asked before he could stop himself. At this rate the ice cream would be melted by the time they ate it, and they hadn't even bought it yet.

"See, it's this really cool game that Two-bit, Steve, and I started to play a while back. We make the toilet speak and it's really hilarious!"

"What do you make it say?" Terry asked.

"Ok well this one time…" Soda giggled. "This is Two-bit doing the toilet-talk. I'll say toilet or Two-bit before each thing…it gets confusing with all the T's!  
Two-bit: So how's life been going for ya T-man.  
Toilet: It's been all right but the other day someone made a big old dump and it was quite unpleasant since it wouldn't flush quite right and some got stuck…"

"TOO MUCH INFORMATION!" Johnny shrieked.

Two-bit: Is it gross to have people going to the bathroom on you all day?  
Toilet: Well only if they have a hairy ass…not that I'm naming any names.

Two-bit: Spill it girl!"

Toilet: Omg that just sounded sooo gay!  
Two-bit: FUCK YOU! Ok so anyway! Can you describe one of the most traumatizing incidents that you've had to endure in your line of work?  
Toilet: Well it's awful when someone comes to jack off on me. Like the other day I was sitting here minding my own business when some dirty boy came in and starting stroking the munchkin…"

"OK STOP TALKING RIGHT THERE!" Ponyboy said shuddering.

"Why! Because you don't want the truth to be revealed? Well guess what, you CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

"Pony?" Johnny sounded scared and 'dramatic', "What does he mean? Oh golly, say it aint so!"  
"He just said…golly…" Terry said to dally and had to suppress a laugh. He found he was doing that a lot here.

"Just be happy he didn't say gee whizzy, cheesy whiz!" Dally replied.

"Yeah! YEAH!" Soda said with a crazed look in his eye and pointed at Ponyboy. "Tell him Pony! It was YOU toilet was talking about!"

"You just did." Terry pointed out.

"Okilie doodly!" Soda said, glad for another opportunity to use his catch phrase. He was proud because he hadn't enlisted Steve's help to make it.

"But Pony doesn't have a hairy ass…" Johnny said with a confused look. This raised some questions and eyebrows, including Ponyboys.

"Well, now I'm even more disturbed than I was ten seconds ago, if that's possible." Ponyboy said sadly. "Let's just stop talking about this."

"Ok, right!" Soda said ignoring the last bit. "So we were playing the game, and I wanted to put a pink bow on to symbolize Mrs. Toilet, but Steve wanted to use a red bow. Then to top it off he wanted to have a beer, but I wanted to have a soda!" He looked angry.

"Those are stupid reasons to end a friendship…" Dally gave a dramatic pause which signified that there would be two random New-York stories in one chapter. "I once was at a store…"

"The one you got arrested at in the last story?" Johnny asked.

"Yup." Dally replied. "So I was standing there, and my friend came over and was all like 'hey dally you want a coke?', and I got pissed because he knew I hate cokes and then I socked him in the face, and he never offered me a coke again." Dally looked proud.

"Was he ok?"

"Huh?"

"Was your friend ok?" Ponyboy repeated.

"Huh, what? Oh no he died." Dally said looking confused.

Ponyboy thought the option of remaining silent was the best choice.

"Is that all Soda?" Terry asked, getting extremely impatient.

Soda thought for a moment. "No it isn't! PLUS he wanted me to wear my green underwear, and I wanted to wear blue underwear," He turned to Ponyboy "You know! The ones with the pink flowers that you wanted to borrow last week!"

That just scared the hell out of everyone.

"Why was he picking out your underwear?" Dally was the only one with the courage (stupidity) to ask.

"Well D-uh! Hullo! He has the fashion sense of our group. Or at least of the two of us." He added so as not to offend any of the other greasers.

This was the exact opposite of what Ponyboy was thinking. He thought of Steve had the fashion sense of a box of macaroni and cheese. 'I mean really!' Ponyboy thought 'had soda _seen_ the outfit Steve had worn to their house? The colors had been so off and didn't he realize that white leisure suits were so out! Wait…he didn't want to be having these strange thoughts. He pretended he had never thought that…he seemed to be getting very good at that. He swore he would never ever speak of it.

"Johnny! I just had thoughts about fashion errors made by a member of the gang!" At least Johnny didn't know who he meant. Ponyboy never had been good at keeping secrets for less than 10 minutes…if he got past that 10 minute mark he was in the clear…but those hellish 10 first minutes…oh he shudders to think.

"Just take deep breaths Pony…Hey wait, were you talking about Steve's leisure suit?"

"Yeah…"

"Damn that thing was so out four weeks ago."

"I know! What was he thinking?"

"I almost DIED when I saw it! Haha, I can't believe he wore that."

"I know! I'd never be caught dead…" Ponyboy thought for a moment. "NO JOHNNY! It's happening again!" He started freaking out.

"It's ok Pony, just take deep breaths and count sheep." Johnny tried to sound relaxing. After all, that's what he did when his parents got angry with him.

"Um…ok?" Pony turned back to the others who were now discussing what conditioner they used, much to Dally's dismay.

"…It makes my hair shine!" Soda was explaining to Terry.

"Well mine makes it sexily smooth."

"DAMN! That's some bad-ass condish!" Soda said feeling Terry's hair and vise-versa. Dally merely shuddered.

"I want ice cream!" Johnny began crying even though he never seemed to cry unless he was being beat up by a certain Soc with rings on his fingers, but that story has absolutely nothing to do with this.

Since Johnny was the pet of the gang they all began walking to the ice cream shop, but suddenly it was time for yet another distraction.

The guys heard screaming, and they saw a girl with shiner hair than Sodas, a seemingly tougher exterior/attitude than Dally, and a kinder more abused heart than Johnny's. She was fighting seven huge Soc's for no reason…except the one she told them after the Soc's ran away…

:D Hope you guys enjoyed. I have I think up to seven chapters written.


	4. Chapter 4

Time Travlin' Terry: Chapter 4

Disclaimer: The brilliant S.E Hinton owns Outsiders. If anyone thinks that please go ask a random person if you could put Pepto-Bismol on them and wipe it off with your butt, then you'll have your answer.

Reading your reviews makes me so happy. I love you guys XD. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

On with the fic!

"What the hell does it have to do with you! Just stay out of my business! It's my life and I don't need you to tell me how to live!" After answering the non-asked and never-intended-to-be-asked question, the girl fainted for absolutely no reason because she was in perfectly good health…or so they thought.

"Well what do we do with her?" Johnny asked while shading his eyes from her shiny hair.

"We should check her for wounds." Pony said thoughtfully and for some reason lifted her shirt up slightly to reveal that a large bruise had materialized out of nowhere. Pony lifted her shirt up further, and no one even questioned this or thought it was slightly wrong. Johnny said abruptly. "We just gotta take her home with us until she gets better!"

"Gee whizzy, cheesy whiz!"

"Can't we just leave her here?" Dally asked with an annoyed expression. This girl had somehow insulted his pride with her presence, and he wasn't going to warm up to her until the next chapter…or if she was a super mary-sue…he would warm up slightly, and she would realize he did have a heart.

"Yeah Dallas, I bet you're gonna fall in love with this chick awful soon!" Terry sniggered as he read Dally's mind using their super, awesomely awesome, telepathic connection.

"Fudge you!"

"OKILEE DOO!" Said Soda who had just stood there for the past 10 minutes.

"So wait…since we're bringing her home with us does that mean we have to bring her to get ice-cream too?" Pony asked after checking the girl for more bruises.

"Guess so." Johnny said, and they began to walk off, leaving Soda, Terry, and Dally to do the dirty work.

"I don't want to get my nails messed up or nothing…" Soda mumbled and went to catch up with Johnny and Pony.

When they finally got the ice-cream place Johnny thought it would cheer up the girl—who was still unconscious—if they got her some ice cream.

"You feed it to her Pony!" Johnny said; he was scared of the girl because she seemed rather Soc like…but she couldn't be, could she? DUN DUN DUN!

"Oh fine I'LL do it! Just stop arguing already, I CANT TAKE THE FIGHTING ANYMORE!" Soda sighed dramatically, dropped ice cream on the girl's wounded yet still-so-gorgeous face, then proceeded to toss his head dramatically and run from the shop. Since the door had just finished being cleaned Soda didn't see it, and he ran into it. Now they all had to pitch in to bring the two gorgeous people home.

"I GET DIBS ON SODA!" Dally said excitedly and ran before they could argue with him. Unfortunately, while running away he had forgotten to grab Soda and had to go back to get him, therefore, Terry and Johnny started to laugh at him. Pony was too busy thinking about sunsets and space hearts to even notice.

When the guys got home they found the rest of the gang there because they never seemed to have anything else to do in a fanfic…unless of course they were actually needed, then Steve would be at work or thinking bad thoughts about Pony in the graveyard, Two-bit would be getting drunk or dancing in the moonlight even if it was broad daylight, or Darry would be working, sleeping, or busy spanking random neighbors.

"OOOHHH Pony got laid!" Two-bit said, and everybody cracked up because Two-bit was always saying clever things like that.

The boys all just sat there with smiles plastered on their faces for a few hours until the girl finally woke up.

"AH! Who are you amazingly gorgeous group of guys that soon I will fall in love with? I don't mind if you gave me a bath because I'm used to my gang brother's doing that, I'm not embarrassed or nothing."

"Um no…" Dally said looking scared.

"Well who are you?"

"Weeeeelll," Two-bit started "That over there is Steve," He pointed to Dally. "That over there is Ponyboy," he pointed to Darry. "That's Soda," he pointed at Steve which made Soda glare at Steve because he was still mad at him. "That's Darry," He pointed to Johnny. "That's Johnny right there," he pointed at Darry. "That's Two-bit," he pointed at Terry. "That's Dally," he pointed at Steve with something other than his finger. "And I'm Terry, at you're service madam!" He took off his strange, large, mid-evil hat and bowed to the girl who had fallen back asleep.

She woke up again and suddenly knew all their names. "My name is Fantasia Rainbow Giraffe Florgenshnburg, it's spelled with a silent N." She added that piece of information because her birthday was soon coming up, and she was hoping for some birthday cards.

"Well that's just dandy, now why don't you leave?" Dally asked looking irritated; There was no way he was giving any birthday cards.

"But haven't you all warmed up to me yet? Don't you feel a sudden, irrepressible urge to save me from my abusive yet amazingly handsome step-brother who's been using and raping me ever since I blossomed into a gorgeous, yet tough chick, who hates her social upbringing and longs to love people for who they truly are are are?"

"You said are 3 times."

"Are are are are?"

"AROOOOO!" Two-bit joked, and everyone laughed.

"AROOOO!" Pony said and Steve punched him because they only would laugh at the things Two-bit said.

"No." Johnny said to answer her insanely long question/statement.

"Well FINE!" She got up and floated out of the house and whistled for her magical Pegasus, "Until we meet again greasers!" and with that she flew into a glass window just like Soda and then flew away.

"Dinner's ready!" Darry called from next to the guys.

"You didn't make anything…" Johnny said with a strange look in his eyes.

"Oh didn't I?" Darry said with a flirty voice.

Johnny hid behind Pony because he was the only one who hadn't terrified him completely that day. "Um no?" he finally answered.

"Well we're having chocolate cake, chocolate milk, and chocolate shoes for dinner!" Darry said happily and walked inside.

"OOOHHH!" Pony and Soda shrieked at the same time "I get to dip my shoe first!"

"Um…shoe dip?" Terry asked.

"It's what we have when we can't afford a bow tie." Soda answered patiently.

"Right-O."

"Bogaliebo!" Two-bit said, and everybody had to clutch their sides they were laughing so hard.

"That reminds me," Dally said intently as he started another New York story, "Of a time when I lived in New York." Johnny and Pony exchanged looks. "One day I was prancing around in my brand new underwear when suddenly my friend…I'll call him 'Harris'…said 'Dally give back my underwear'. After that he never once was quite able to rhyme again." Then Dally shook his head almost sadly—almost because Dally never shows emotions except on random and special occasions—and then turned to go to the table.

While they all sat around the table, Darry again asked how exactly they had met Terry Riding.

"….and then they ended up not performing their musical because Dally and Ponyboy messed up the order."

"Hahahahaha you guys practiced a musical…you're like a…like a big shot or something." Steve said and sniggered.

Terry made a mental note for the movie: Steve said 'like a big shot' a lot or when he couldn't think of anything else to say which is the same thing.

"Oh, so that's what you were doing at school!" Soda realized suddenly.

"What were they doing at school? I hope you mean getting good grades." Darry said responsibly.

"Naw," Steve said, eager for a chance to try to get Pony in trouble, "They used to sometimes take long bathroom breaks, and one time I followed and heard some singing, but then I realized that Soda wasn't with me, so I got scared and left."

Soda looked up and blinked, "You really mean that Stevie?"

Steve looked embarrassed, "Yeah, you know I never would go there without you…"

"Oh Stevie, I'm so sorry about our fight!"

"Me too Sodie!"

They embraced over the table and the chocolate fell all over the floor. "PONY! Clean this mess up right now!" Darry yelled.

"Why don't they do it?"

"They're too busy hugging, and Steve's a guest in this house!" Darry answered even though he never really considered the gang guests because they all practically lived there.

"Yeah well you…you…you smell like poop!" Ponyboy screamed and ran from the house.

"Well at least we don't practice musical numbers…" Said a random gang member.

"HEY! We worked long and hard on that! Didn't we Dallay?" Johnny said Dally's name with a strange accent and looked angry. "Don't you remember how we had to sneak Cherry Vallance in to choreograph the moves for us? You know how much work that took?" Johnny got up and ran after Pony.

"Haha musical numbers." Steve said and laughed.

"Shouldn't you go after them?" Terry asked, confused.

Darry looked strangely calm, "In due time." He said creepily, "In due time."

Terry sank back in his chair and waited for the next chapter.

Thanks for reading please R/R! Remember, I do not mean to offend anyone and no matter how bad a fic is at least people are writing for this section…I think.


	5. Chapter 5

Time Travlin' Terry: Chapter 5

Llefay: I think I'm a little bit in love with you right now. YES that was a Quatre reference :huge smile: I'm so happy someone caught it.

Thank you all for your reviews, they make my day, and they give me so much incentive to update this baby. Which I have written a new chapter for. I now have up through eight completed.

When the next chapter started they were already finished dinner. The only reason the gang regretted not going after Pony sooner was because none of them wanted to clear the table themselves. Terry had been extremely glad when dinner was over because Steve had just laughed the whole time, mumbling things about musical numbers and big shots and then giggling. The only conversation Terry really found interesting—if you could even say that—probably would have to have been the one about the price of gas.

"So how much does gas cost now?" Terry asked.

"Weeell…It would cost less if I made it from my bottom." Soda giggled.

"Right…"

"But anyway what's that got to do with the price of beans in China?" Soda asked, then something dawned on him and Steve at the same time.

"Beans! Beans! They're good for your heart. The more you eat 'em the more you fart! The more you fart, the better you feel, so eat those beans at every meal! YAY!" Steve basically had just been following along with Soda so his words had come seconds after Soda's, except for a few times when he got lucky.

"WOAH!" Soda thought of something brilliant "Ok, right, so you know how beans make you gassy? Well I was just talking about that kind of gas!" Soda chortled happily —because the word 'chortled' sounded strange here—then picked up his fork.

"Wait isn't it 'what's that got to do with the price of _tea_ in China'?" Terry asked skeptically.

"You say salami, I say salmon." Soda gave his wise answer with a solemn face.

"Right-o."

"Bogalibo!" Two-bit had to get in on this action.

"Two-bit, you just said that joke." Terry said exasperatedly as the others laughed hysterically. He added in his mind 'and it wasn't funny then either.' Suddenly he froze 'but what if this world was somehow stuck and they simply laughed at whatever Two-bit said.'

Dally heard Terry's thoughts. "Nope," He said with a mouthful of shoe (and not something else) "Two-bit just has that magical charm."

So he said as Two-bit put a straw in his chocolate milk—which he mixed with beer—and drank through his nose.

"This is not dinner appropriate conversation." Darry said with an annoyed expression.

"Wow super-pope you're losing your touch and timing, like…like a big shot or something." Steve put in amusedly.

"YOU AINT ALLOWED TO CALL ME NO SUPER POPE!" Darry got up and forced Steve to read religious stories for them all.

After that horror was done, Darry decided to not spank them because he wanted Pony to be there to get spanked too. This made him decide it was time to look for him. He switched into 'I-care' mode, "Oh hell! Pony's gone. Oh god, I didn't mean it! We have to find him! Wait…I know of a way. I think…" He paused, "Yes, I do in fact think it's the time for it to awaken…"

"No…" Soda's face became serious…seriously worried. "You can't mean…"

"Yes. Yes I do. Soda go and open it!"

With that, Soda bit his lip and moved the dresser that was in the middle of their living room, but no one had ever noticed it until now even though it was sticking out like…like Steve's leisure suit. There were some decorations on the dresser that showed they had been trying to be discreet when putting it up. Their only other option had been to move the kitchen (they decided that just to move the oven would have been far too inconvenient) into the living room and the living room into the kitchen. Darry then realized that it would be even more likely for the gang to steal their chocolate because sometimes they forgot where the fridge was…but if it was in the living room where they walked in then they could say shalom and buh-bye to their precious chocolate.

None of them quite understood how switching the rooms would have helped matters, but Darry's motto was, "It has to make sense to someone and not just me or even me."

Behind the dresser was a door with a strange symbol.

"What's that symbol for?" Two-bit asked and then waited patiently while everyone laughed their asses off. Two-bit had grown used to this. 'That's the price you pay for being a sex symbol' (he was drunk when he thought of that) and then he went off to dance with blondes (manly blondes.)

"Oh that Ol thang?" Darry said, "Each of us had to do one thing or else nothing would keep it inside. I inscribed it to keep _it _inside. Soda put the dresser there, and Pony put lots of books in there to keep it busy. Pony…Oh god!" Darry remembered he was still in 'I-care' mode. "PONY!" Darry cried, but of course it was only on the inside because Darry could never let himself cry. Two-bit would have fallen hard for him and seen inside and loved Darry for who he was. He would be the only one to see the great man (for Darry was truly manly and no mere boy) he truly was. That would have been too out of character, though. Two-bit liked blondes.

"But how will this "it" help? What can it do that I can't?" Angela Shepard—yes she is now a sheepherder. She was angry at her family one day and decided it would be a good fashion statement, since she loves fashion so much. The rest of them (for purposes of this story) spelled their last name Shepered)—asked sexily because that was the only way she could talk.

"When did you get here?" Dally asked; He clearly didn't like her. Terry instantly noticed this because of the unbreakable bond that had been formed in these past chapters.

Terry didn't have to say anything to hear Dally's reason for hating her. "Oh that's because she got between me and Tim." Dally said to him. "Don't worry, though," he quickly added, "I like you better…" he caught himself before he allowed certain emotions to slip. "That is…if I could like people…I'm tough, gimmee a cig….GIMMEE!"

Angela somehow ignored, or just didn't hear, any of this. "Soda called me because I can sniff Pony from 3.6 miles away. I know because I was measuring when I was home sick, and when he went into the bathroom I lost track of him."

"How did you know the school bathroom was 3.6 miles from your house?" Dally asked.

"You mean from my room." She corrected.

"Oh yes that makes ALL the difference." Terry said sarcastically, but Angela didn't notice.

"I measured it in case it ever came in handy."

"Oh… okay." Dally said, still confused.

"How did you know he was in the bathroom?" Soda asked.

"I heard him peeing."

"See what I mean? She'll find Pony!" Soda said proudly. "Who are you again?"

"Angela."

"Oh, ok!"

"Anyway, it's just another one of my many talents. I can also hear Pony from a mile away." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, and she and Two-bit ended up having an eyebrow wiggle contest.

"Open it already!" Soda cried.

Darry said some sort of incantation under his breath. It sounded something like "OOOgie Shoogy Alaga googy." Or maybe that's what it was.

Suddenly the symbol on the door began to glow (suggestively) and the door unlocked. It burst open and out came Azlan from Narnia! Just kidding! The door really burst open to reveal a girl who had a mix of features from all the Curtis boys, but she looked strangely like a mary sue…I mean Soda!"

"OMIGOSH! You let me in!" She clapped her hands.

Darry stood tall and firm with his mouth tight, "That's Milkshake Booger-Lemonade Curtis. She's…"

"EW!" Steve screamed, "The 3 of you had a baby…like like some big shots or something!"

"She's our sister…she went to live with our mother's old best friend who'd always wanted a daughter and tried to steal her once, but then failed. My mother, who had visions her whole life, predicted that she would die right when Milkshake needed a mother most. She made her friend her god mother. I bet, though, that Milkshake was horribly abused by someone there and had some abortion and wants to live with us. A brother knows these things."

"Then why did you leave her there?"

"Oh, we never liked her very much."

"Wait where does that place lead to?" Dally put in.

"Oh it leads back and forth between her house in Alaska and here." Darry answered in a matter of fact voice. "If you cut left, though, you can go to Narnia." (This time I'm not joking.)

"I have brothers? You're my brothers?" She said so it would create some much needed drama. "I've been lied to my whole life! So," She smiled "I bet I'm Soda's twin right?"

"Um no…" Soda and Steve lied. Steve lied too because he didn't want anyone else taking up Soda's time. Pony did that enough.

"Shut up, Soda, and give me a hug! Oh but don't you love me right away, we need some serious relationship and character development first!"

Soda wore an expression of pain, "Don't worry," he said meekly "I won't."

"Ok, so isn't it time to find Pony?" Two-bit asked only no one knew Two-bit had said it, so no one laughed.

"Who asked that?" Darry asked.

"Um…" Two-bit thought for a moment, "Angela." He didn't want to ruin the moment.

"Oh yeah, Angela dose have sort of a manly voice," Angela glared at him, "A sexy man voice." He apologized, and she smiled and nodded her head.

"Ok guys it's time to G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-GO!"

They all got into their giant robots and went to go "save" Pony. Oh yeah, and maybe they'd find Johnny along the way.

Oh one thing about the first chapter, there were no cell phones (small ones at least) when the movie was made. It was supposed to be that way. Making fun of fics where they seem to get their time periods confused. Just wanted to make that clear.

Haha sorry about the glows (suggestively) part, for some reason it made me laugh because it was so weird. Also, sorry that there were no "New York brag

stories" I didn't want it to get too repetitive although it is a recurring joke, obviously. Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

Time Travlin Terry: Chapter 6

Thanks Jazzyumbrella, goddess of sarcasm, and maxter for your reviews, it's very much appreciated and I'm glad you like it. This chapter is completely insane, enjoy

"Dar?" Soda said turning to Darry who he was already facing.

"Yeeeeuuupp?" Darry said still facing Soda.

"Um, why is it that Milkshake'll be able to help us find Pony? We're related to him too ya know."

Darry's face grew solemn…er and he laid a hand on Soda's shoulder. "Well lil monkey, it's partially women's intuition but there's another reason…" Darry hesitated for 10 minutes. "You, Milkshake, and Pony are twins."

Audible gasps were able to be heard from the gang who had all crowded around. Including Curly Shepard who had come over to get money from Angela and make sure she wasn't trying to prostitute herself to the other gang for the money. Plus he secretly wanted to see if Pony was up to burning his hand with a cigarette again. Good times, good times he reminisced.

"But wait," Soda said, "that could only be if I weren't related to you guys."

"No, no you're one of ours." Darry said, re-checking the birth certificates. He still had to take care of Soda.

"You mean…" Soda started eyes wide.

"Yes." Darry nodded "Pony was born two years late."

"Oh ok then. But what I was going to say was that we're triplets."

"Twins." Darry said shaking his head.

"There's 3 of us."

"If there were 3 of you it would be quintuplets Soda." Darry realized this was why Soda had dropped out of high school.

"Sure Darry sure." Soda said trying to drop the subject.

"I'll talk to you when we get back." How could Soda take that tone with him? He'd have to wait to yell at him when Pony got back. He wanted Pony to be there. Knowing him he would say something so Darry could yell at him instead of Soda. He was in that kind of mood.

First he switched back to I-care mode. "Alright lets go go GANG POWER!"

"DARRY!" Darry thrust his hand up in the air.

"SODA!" Soda put his hand next to Darry's touching the rings that had just appeared on their fingers, together.

"STEVE!" Steve put his hand up next to Soda's, edging closer to him then necessary.

"DALLAY!" Dally said in the strange accent that Johnny liked to use to say his name. He put his hand up next to Steve's.

"JOHNNY!" Normally Two-bit and Johnny would have both screamed at the same time since Johnny would have pushed Two-bit out of the way so he could touch Dally's hand.

"TWO-BIT!" Two-bit would have forgotten what he was mad about.

Instead though Two-bit just stood there until Dally punched him with his free fist and he joined the others.

Angela, Terry, Curly and Milkshake watched as the guys began to skip to their loo in the "carefully" formatted circle that they had formed. After 2000 times around they stopped in the exact spots that they had started in.

"POWER TO THE GANG! BANG!"

In Two-bits world they all jumped into robots and went to go find Pony.

In real life they all just began running in circles until they decided to split up.

In a faraway place that was pretty close by:

"I'm cold and alone. No one loves me. My life is empty. Flowerless sorrow. Empty bird ridden forest. Scarlet winds that blow away my tears of passionate melon coma's." He paused for a moment "No…I CANT EVEN WRITE POETRY!" He sobbed.

"I know how to poetry up your day greaser chickana." Came a flirty voice that could only come from a SOC!

"Yeah greaser chickana." Said the strange friend that repeats everything the lead evil guy says.

"Are you gonna rape me?" Pony asked "Cause if you are I'm gonna tell Darry."

"Well you know we weren't but now that you mention it you have a nice tight tushy and I think I'd like to put my zucchinis in it." He pulled out two very different zucchinis.

Pony ran but for some reason everything was in slow motion except for the Soc's catching him.

"Man you know we shouldn't be doing this Babin. It's wrong, that ain't no kitty cat."

"Shut up man! You know you're enjoying it. He's a hot lil monkey." He stuffed a zucchini into Pony's mouth.

"HEY YOU!" A stalker-like voice cried out. "YOU LEAVE HIM ALONE!"

Pony gasped and the zucchini feel out of his mouth "Fantasia!"

"Yes Pony it is I and Rudolph the red nosed Pegasus here to save the day."

By the time she was done being a moron the Soc's had already walked home. She turned to face their dust "I'LL GET YOU AND YOU'RE LITTLE ZUCCHINI TOO!"

"Leave." Ponyboy said angst…fully.

"Why?" She stuck out her chin which made her look odd.

"Do you have a crink in your neck?" Pony asked rudely, trying to be polite.

"No I don't! Is that any thanks for me saving your _life_!"

"But you didn't! You just stood there introducing you and Rupert!"

"RUDOLPH!"

"Just go away! Let me mourn my lost virginity and write poems!"

"You were a virgin!" She giggled.

Pony looked mad and pointed towards a tree indicating that she should leave or climb up a tree. Or both.

She pouted and looked like a creepy fish. A lovely creepy fish. "But…but Pony! We're so close. What happened to us?"

He looked scared. "I've never liked you. We just brought you home and since you've woken up you've been nothing but annoying and creepy!"

She gave him a stalker look "Me? creepy? Ah Pony," She shook her head and tried a different tactic "I'll be able to find you even in the darkest toilet. Won't you miss me when I'm gone?"

"No! God you're confusing me." He started bawling and finally Fantasia Rainbow Giraffe Florgenshnburg (with a silent n) and her Pegasus left. But not before giving Pony a long and knowing (stalker) look.

"PONY!" Johnny came out of the bushes and hugged his friend. "I saw the whole thing!"

"Isn't she so annoying? She wouldn't just leave!"

"Wha…who? I just saw two guys rape you."

"Why didn't you help me?"

"I dunno I guess I just didn't think of it." Johnny shrugged.

"Oh well ok then." Pony nodded since that made sense. "Oh god! Johnny I gotta pee!"

"It's ok man." Johnny began to sob for some reason "I won't watch ya."

"Um thanks…" Pony edged away and went to pee in the bushes. That's where everybody peed in those days. It was the fashion.

ELSE WHERE:

"We've looked everywhere but there no signs of Pony!" Everyone cried to Darry who was sitting in the bushes being _fashionable_.

"Well have you looked in the lot?" He asked them while Soda handed him a leaf.

"Yes." "No." Angela and Milkshake said at the same time.

"Yeah Angela we so went there 10 minutes ago because you thought you saw Pony's silhouette in the moonlight..."

"Ya Milkshake but it turned out it was day so we didn't go there."

"Yeah but then you thought you saw his silhouette in the daylight."

"No I thought that but didn't act on it."

"Well then how did I know that."

"Because I love you."

"No because I love you."

"You love me?"

"Yes, and I always have…all those days in the closet I spent thinking about you!"

"Oh Milk!"

"OH ANGUS!"

They embraced in a way between lesbian and friend.

"OOOH MAMA!" Two-bit said wishing they were blonde.

"WOOEEE" Steve and Soda and Curly hollered.

"THAT'S MY SISTER!" Soda and Curly yelled at each other at the same time.

Darry just looked like a porno director. All smug and stuff on his bush throne.

"They like…like big shots." Steve whispered to Dally who was vomiting into pavement cracks. Terry was holding Dally's beautiful locks of golden hair out of his face with his hands, feeling it's silkiness between his fingers. Wait what?

"Let's just go look in the lot already." Darry suggested and everyone forgot about what had happened. Except for one person…someone who'd been watching in the bushes…with her Pegasus.

Sure enough in the lot they sensed that the boys had been there seconds before. If they weren't there then where could they be?

FIND OUT IN THE NEXT COMPELLING AND CRAZED CHAPTER OF TIME TRAVLIN TERRY!

R/R please and I hope you enjoyed, thank you for reading! I hope you still retain what little sanity you had when you came to read this.


	7. Chapter 7

Time Travlin Terry: Chapter 7

"Omg Johnny, where are we gonna go?" Pony, who was currently upside down trying to blow his nose because he had nothing better to do, asked.

"Well, where do we always go when we have a problem?" Johnny replied sensibly.

"Ummm…to Darry?" Pony answered and burst into tears of love that was intertwined with sorrow and…some other sappy stuff.

"Nooo. Ok let me put it like this. If a….a….a….Soc that had a lot of rings tried to kill us for bein' with his girl and her friend and then we—well me—killed him to save our lives, where would you go?"

Pony opened his mouth to speak and Johnny said quickly, "Not Darry. In this hypothetical scenario that will probably never happen, Darry hit you."

Pony thought. "Not Darry?"

"Getting closer."

"Oh! That's easy. I'd go to Bucks hoping Dally was there to help us. Dally always knows what to do."

"Duh! Right on."

Elsewhere:

"Ok, so where would the guys go if they killed someone?" Terry suggested, knowing the whole book and working from there.

"Oh!" Dally snapped his fingers and did a little dance. "They would go to Bucks, of course."

Darry lowered his already lowered eyes. "Why would they go to Bucks? Have they been sucked in by Bucks rugged good looks and charm?"

Dally was confused since Buck possessed neither of these things. He was just kind of sloppy looking and perverted. Well to each his own, Dally thought and shrugged.

"Why are you shrugging?" Soda asked because he liked to comment on the dumbest things.

Dally sighed. "I dunno Soda, but that reminds me of a story."

Everyone sighed and braced themselves.

"One time I was going to rob a bank. I asked my friend 'hey Marcus, do you want to rob it too?' and you know what the guy did? He shrugged."

"Well that was kind of an improvement. At least you mentioned shrugging, but that was the worst story ever!" Steve said and flicked his ashes at Dally since Pony wasn't around, and he was feeling lucky…punk.

"Wait so what happened to the guy?" Soda asked before Dally could go wild on Steve's ass and get all up in his face.

"Huh? Oh right. He went to jail and died of lead poisoning."

"Right-O"

"Bogalie Bo."

"Anyway," Darry said "We need a plan. I, of course, have one. What we're going to do is…" For some reason Darry started to whisper because they did that on TV shows…which he never had anytime to watch, but secretly did. "Dally is going to intercept them there, and we'll all hide around and wing it from there. Sound good?"

Like anyone would argue with Darry.

Back to the run away silly willies:

"You knock."  
"No you!"  
"OK, here's what we'll do," Johnny decided, since Pony was still mentally unbalanced, "We'll play Lemon, Melon, Chicken for it."

"How do you play that?"

"Um, Duh. Basically you put your fist out for Melon which beats chicken, you put your hand out flat for lemonade which beats melon, and you put out two fingers for chicken like a beak which beats lemonade."

"That sounds an awful lot like rock papers scissors." Pony said eying Johnny suspiciously.

This caused Johnny to become defensive, which is never a good thing. "Well it's not so just…just stop it! Ok? Or else you can just go to jail for killing that guy."

"Johnny that was your fake scenario."

"Just drop it Pony, just drop it like Suzie. You need to let it go."

"Who's Suzie already?"

"Oh Pony, how very much you have to learn."

Ponyboy was convinced by Johnny's sheer calm and non-freaking out ness. "Alright, let's do this thang."  
In the end Pony obviously had to knock on the door because Johnny was too good at his own game.

"Hellooo?" Buck said as he answered the door.

"Hello." Pony said, only with less o's.

Johnny didn't say anything, just acted quiet and jumpy like usual.

"So how can I help you boys…? Would you like to come in for a game of hide and go find my sweet spot?"

"No thanks."

"How about a nice cold drink of lemon-suck-me?"

"No."

"Well do you need me to search you for butt lice?"

"NO!"

"Well fine then what is it then?" Buck asked with annoyance.

"We need to find Dally."

"Well you're in luck, Dally just went back there." Buck lied, but to his immense pleasure Pony and Johnny headed 'back there' to Dally's usual room.

"Hey! That's not Dally!" Pony said at the same time that Johnny was saying "Hi Dally!" to a coat hanger.

"Tee Hee now you have to play my game of what's the surprise in my pants!" Buck declared.

"NOT SO FAST!" Dally said from behind Buck.

"Dally? NO! How can it be you? I thought you were dead."

"Well you thought wrong buddy, and now I'm back and better than ever to save Johnny and Pony!"

"But how did you figure out my diabolical plan?"

"Oh it was easy Buck, it was easy…for your name isn't really Buck now is it?"

"Yes it is."

"Oh. Well, it was still easy because I saw the long letter you sent to Darry explaining your plan."

"Oh that. I didn't think you would be able to not misinterpret it." Buck said even though he didn't know what the hell Dally was talking about; he just thought he was sexy.

"Whatever that means…yes…" Dally smirked.

"Well you won't win yet!" Buck shrieked and suddenly 8 Soc's appeared and began to head towards Dally.

"No you don't!" Everyone else shouted as they came in.

"How did you guys know where I'd be?" Dally shouted to them happily while punching a Soc in the face.

"We knew because of the power of love you fool!" Terry shouted, but didn't know why.

"Great! Let's go guys!"

The rest of the gang, except for Pony and Johnny who had suddenly turned into whiny babies who couldn't fight, helped Dally to defeat the evil Soc's and steal Bucks magical ring from 20 years ago which he'd stolen from Princess Margretta from dimension number 3.

"Thank god that's over!" Pony said as they went home.

"It may be over Pony, but it's never really over." Darry said and wrapped his arms around Pony's shoulder. He would have to spank him later; they'd been through far too much.

While everyone was hugging and celebrating, someone (obviously it's Fantasia and her stupid Pegasus) watched them and their joy with jealousy.

Find out more in the next compelling and crazy and somewhat confusing even to me, TIME TRAVLIN TERRY!


	8. Chapter 8

Time Travlin' Terry: Chapter 8 

"I'm jealous." Fantasia said to her Pegasus, Rudolf—whose name was really Ronald, but Fantasia was too busy counting her chickens before they laid eggs, which then in turn hatched into headless chickens who couldn't lay eggs, to get his name right— who didn't really give a crap either way as long as he got a carrot at the end of the day.

"There must be something I can do…" She thought out loud to herself, thinking she was speaking to the man across the street. She decided to go to the place where most of her great (retarded) ideas came to her: The meat packing plant down the street.

XxXx

A week since Buck's Battle had passed, and things still weren't quite back to normal at the Curtis household.

"Darry, I have to talk to you." Soda said with frustration as he tried to get around the large dresser that was still in their living room.

"Well you need to make an appointment."

"What?"

"New rule." Darry quipped.

Soda was puzzled as he had not been informed of any new rules since Darry decided there was a one spank entrance fee. That had been long forgotten, though.

"You can't keep changing up the rules, _DARRELLA_."

"Oh no you di'int!" Darry thundered girlishly. "I can make up whatever rules I want in this house."

Soda sighed. "Fine. How do I make an appointment?"

"Well first you have to talk to my newest assistant." And out from behind the couch came a girl who bore an uncanny resemblance to Fantasia. Probably because it was her, but no one seemed to be able to see through her brilliant disguise, which consisted of a different pair of pants then the ones she'd been wearing the day before.

"Hello. I'm…Fantasio…Bandarienaz."

"Hey you seem oddly, almost familiar, but OK. I'm pretty." Soda smiled and reached out a hand, but pulled away before she could shake it because he realized he didn't want to risk getting cooties. Only Pony knew how to give a good cootie shot, and Pony was the whole reason he was trying to set up this crazy appointment. Who knew when Darry would even be free!

"I'm here to set up an appointment with Darrel Curtis."

"Name."

"Franklin Cherryson-Burgensburg."

'Fantasio' began writing that down on the wall since they were too poor to afford paper even though they seemed to buy everything else just fine.

"That's not your real name." Darry said with irritation.

'Fantasio' stopped writing, and she turned to watch with wide, bright-crimson-blue-eyes that seemed to always be sparkling, as Darry and Soda prepared to face off. Without Pony there to piss Darry off, Soda seemed to be taking all the hits.

"Well what _is_ my real name then, Darry? Huh? Would you even _know_ anymore? I mean you never pay any attention to me! Pony Pony Pony! That's all I ever hear!"

"Hey pepsi…diet…Diet Pepsi Root Beer. You're just as special to me as Pony as the next guy."

Soda was slightly confused, but that never stopped him from engaging in a forty-five minute hug-a-thon with Darry.

"Know what, lil' monkey? You can have your appointment right now."

"Aw thanks, Darry!"

"Now please step into my office." Darry said and opened the door that no one had ever noticed before. "Have a seat."

"Hey! This room looks awfully familiar."

"Well Soda…that's part of the reason you brought yourself here today."

"Huh!" Soda did a fifteen-take at Darry. "But you wouldn't have let me in if it hadn't been for my pain and sorrowowowowow--Why does this room look so familiar?"

Darry pretended to not understand Soda's German, and he said, "Well let me tell you the story of your past, Soda.

Many years ago, when you were just a boy, this was the kingdom of the Greasers. It was a great kingdom, and Mother and Father were the king and queen."

"Wait, which was which."

Darry thought for a minute. "Mother was the queen. Father was the king."

"Oh, well since you said Mom first and then king first it confused me…go on."

"Well, anyway. This house used to be a splendid palace-mansion-castle until…it was destroyed."  
"But this room looks fine."

"Soda this room used to be yours."

"Seriously? Can I live in here again? Pony can move in too; I don't mind. I mean, it's HUGE. And it looks fine."  
"Yes, well, it would look fine wouldn't it? This is the last remaining room, the only one that survived the fall, except for the other ones."

"What have we been using those for?"

"The one room serves as a safe to all of the money that Mother and Father left us."

"There's money?"  
"Yes, but we can't use it until I turn eighteen."

"Darry you're older than eighteen."

"Soda, you misunderstand me," Darry was seriously starting to see that Soda had been right to drop out of high school. Darry really didn't see where he got his stupidity from. Probably Milkshake's side of the family. "_You_ and _Pony_ have to wait until I turn eighteen to use the money that Mom and Dad left for all of us."

"Right…"

"Greaser-dom was an amazing kingdom." Darry said wistfully, "I just wish Mother and Father were still here to run it."

"Yeah, me too."  
"Now what was it you came here to tell me?" Darry said, changing the subject. He didn't want Soda to start asking questions about the rooms again. For one, talking about the fallen kingdom, the whole palace-mansion-castle part of their house, and the fact that one of them might take over the throne one day (the throne that was in one of the extra rooms that Darry didn't want to talk about) upset him greatly. Plus, he was bored of talking about it. It was also too frustrating to talk to Soda who was really very dense in Darry's not-so-humble opinion.

"Something's wrong with Pony." Soda confessed.

"What. Do you mean?" Darry said oddly.

"You see, there have been a few strange instances since Bucks's Battle. He's just seems so sad lately, and when I walk in a room he freezes and stops cutting himself. He doesn't cry anymore. He seems like he's hiding something. Maybe he's trying to hide the cuts that he hides with his pants and shirts and shoes. I can't figure out what he's trying to hide from us, though."

"We'll have to investigate this further."

"K." Agreed the entire gang who walked out of the royal bathroom at the same time.

"Wait, how did you guys know about the extra rooms?" Soda burst out.

"We had the appointment right before you." Terry explained.

Soda jumped about a mile into the ceiling. "Jesus, Terry! You scared me. I haven't heard a word from you for like…chapters, man. Seriously. I missed ya. Can I touch your hair, cause that would seriously rock my world. Seriously."  
"If you stop saying seriously, I will totally let you."

"Sounds good."

XxXx

In the normal bathroom, Pony sat on the toilet, staring blankly at the wall. He felt sad. He tried to fall into these feelings of emptiness. He wanted to be numb. The pain was so strong; he couldn't bear to live with it anymore. But somehow he liked the pain.

"Oh god, I'm so fucked up!" He sobbed. "I must cut."

Pony made small lines across his thighs and sat back down on the toilet, deciding he was in a good poetry mood. He wrote his best stuff when he was depressed. "Flowerless moon skies. Singing softly in the trees. I sit. I watch. I sigh. I moan. I bleed. I stop bleeding. I go inside." He paused and thought for a minute, then decided some repetition was in order, "Singing softly in the trees. Sparkling crimson cherry pie lover. Love me. Singing softly in the trees."

"Oh. My. God. That was beautiful." Angela Shepard said, stepping out of the shower. "Let us mate."

"No!"

"Fine, then." She said, knowing full well that eventually she would deflower Pony when he was sleeping.

"Why are you in here?"

"I was waiting for you to take a shower so I could surprise you. I'm glad I did because I never knew you were such a deep soul, Pony. Your mumbo jumbo words moved me."

It was at that moment that Pony realized his poetry truly sucked. He would have cried if he was able to shed tears. All he seemed to be able to do now was bleed.

"I'm going to go find a fight now, so I can get hurt and have no one realize what I'm trying to do." He ran out of the bathroom, leaving Angela standing by herself.

"Well I might as well shower." She shrugged.

XxXx

As soon as Pony walked outside he felt a tap on his shoulder.

"Hey, Pony."

"Fantasia?"

"Shhh!" She hissed. "It's _Fantasio_."

"Oooh. I don't care."

"Pony, I was listening through the air vent; Your poetry was beautiful."

Somehow, not coming from Angela, this seemed like a pretty nice compliment. Fantasia was pretty perfect in every way even though Pony pretty much hated her guts. Suddenly though, she didn't seem so bad. She was really growing on him. Probably Dally too, for no apparent reason.

"Even though I hate you, that made me feel good. At least you're not Angela."

"Why thank you."

The stood there for a few moments before Fantasia said, "Let us join forces. Pony. Together we'll be unlimited…together we're unliiiimmiiiteed!"

"There is no fight we cannot win…" Pony sang.

And then together, "Just you and IIIIII defying GRAVITY!"  
Pony stopped the crazy singing. "Wait. No, this is stupid. What are we doing?"

"Joining forces."

"No."

"Come on Pony, you know I'm the only one who can really understand your pain."

"How could you possibly understand it?" Pony sniffed.

"Pony when I was being raped by my gorgeous Soc step-brother, Babin, I was anorexic, and I cut, and was bulimic, and I talked to blankets. You think I don't understand your pain? Well I do."

"Babin…I think that was the name of the Soc that raped me!" The moment where the strange and annoying friend said Babin's name, came back to Pony in full force.

"Yes. Yes it was. That's why I couldn't kill him, Pony."

Pony thought for a minute.

"Ok. I'll join you." Pony said because it was getting late, and he didn't feel like going home to be spanked by Darry. On top of that, he was bored.

"Awesome-mumbo."

"Yuuurrp."

So together they jumped on Rudolf the Red Nose Pegasus and flew away…to the meat packing plant down the street.

TBC

So the song they were singing is from the Broadway play Wicked.

This mentioned a lot of very serious issues. I myself have written about many of those issues. I find it fun to make fun of my own writing as well as the cliché's that tend to be used when writing about these problems. As always, I'm not saying every fic with that in it is like it, and I'm not making light of the issues. They can be and are very serious. But sometimes the best way to deal with things is to see the humor in it all. If you don't agree, please don't be rude about it. It's easy to misinterpret what I'm saying right now, but I tried my best to choose my words carefully. I hope you were able to laugh at it, and not be offended by it.

I felt this note was necessary because I know if I don't put it in, someone will say something.

In this story not only do I make fun of Outsiders fanfiction and stuff, but I make fun of everyday life stuff as well. Like Bucks Battle is based on how like in Lord of the Rings and other quest books/movies they have names for these great battles.

Well, hope you enjoyed I know I had a blast writing it.


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